Chickadee poem.

Chickadee...

This morning as I walked the garden path

I heard the faint cry of a bird spirit... calling..

though the sound was not audible...

At first I couldn't see him, then I spied the little bird

crouched inside a bird feeder...

(I have NO idea how he got in there...)

Removing the top and pouring him out 

with the seed...

he slipped birth-like into 

my awaiting hand.

Sat for a moment, his heart fluttered on my palm,

blinking as if in disbelief

at what had befallen him.

Shuddering with cold, or so I thought,

I held his tiny body warmly to me...

Whispering to him, its alright, ... its alright...

He folded his wings beneath him as he lay down on his side.

His back arched and stretched, eyes opened wide for 

a long moment...

Then curling fetus like,

he closed his eyes for the last time.

A Dream Come True...

A few months ago, I wrote in this blog about my secret desire to learn to paint in oils (or acrylics,)  http://neinahavelin.blogspot.com/2010/05/unspoken-desire.html

... A while back I bought this painting...

"Celebration" by Sophie Frieda

...by the very gifted artist Sophie Frieda...at the same time, I asked her if she would consider teaching me how to paint, which on reflection might have seemed a bit bold, considering I've never had a lesson, and don't really know the first thing about painting..., and,,, and ..... and....

So.., she said "yes" she would help me, (brave woman that she is!)  I invited a dear friend to join me in the fun,  (Sophie suggested that it might be more effective to have two people to teach at the same time, as it would assist the learning process, as each individual learns differently, comes up with different questions, and has different insights that the other might not...)

Today was our first two hour lesson...

Do you know the saying "When the student is ready the teacher will appear?"  Well, until today, I wasn't ready...  If I'd have taken painting lessons before now, I would have beaten myself up for not being "any good at  art!"  and might have stopped, angry and frustrated with myself...  It has been a lifelong weakness..., starting in earnest with goals and longings, then stopping before I've even given myself a chance to get going, (and actually learn something)... 

 Its a very strange thing... wanting something so badly, I would allow myself to try,  then stop, and instead of shaking beginners nerves off (or whatever road block might appear,) over and over I would shoot myself down because ..."I wasn't good at it"... - like IMMEDIATELY!!! and then I would give up trying without question...  Have you ever done that???

Silly really, when I think about it...

My first lesson, learning about light and dark, shadows,

 dimensions, tonal values.., how to really look at a subject...

I think I must have left "the critic" at home today,  as I was able to sit and watch, pay attention to what Sophie had to share and I became rapt/wrapped in the lesson... Time  s - l - o - w - e - d  down, and I gave myself to the work at hand and LOVED every moment of it... and (this may sound silly people,)  I loved myself for letting the joy flow, letting the love and beauty of the moment settle in for a whole two hours..., and leaving judgement at home...  - Something I plan on doing more often!!!

 Cyndi Lauper had it right when she sang "GIRLS JUST WANNA HAVE FUN!"  

Look who I ran into yesterday at the park..., a delightful "Earful of Waxwings.." (Bombycilla cedrorum.)
I read recently that the colorful band on their tail is dependent on the fruit that they eat,,, usually either orange or yellow...  Looking at the beautiful red berries on this Hawthorne, its a wonder their tales aren't scarlet red!  They're very busy birds, and quite difficult to photo, because of their constant squabbling, preening, gulping berries on the fly...  but oh they are so very gorgeous.. I forgive them their flighty nature..

Even though they appear to be engrossed in their feasting, they never seemed to take their kohl lined eyes off of me for a second...  and after a few more moments..., they'd had enough of me taking their photo and took off to a nearby tree...

I waited around for several minutes, being quiet and all, hoping they'd come back to the Hawthorne, but with a sudden cry of "zeeeeeeeeetttt, zeeeeeeettttt..., " from them all, they took off...  in a different direction, not to be seen again.

I feel most honored to have found such a large group of them at this time of year...  Usually if I'm lucky, I get to see them in late spring when the Indian plum tree berries ripen...  Such a surprise ..., such a gift.